Jyotishi ladke Ka Haath Dekhkar
bola:
Beta Tum Bahut Padhoge.
Ladka: Saale, Padh To Main 3 saal
Se Raha Hu, Yeh Bata Paas Kab
Hounga
11:43 AM
1:20 PM
Don't copy if you can't paste!
A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience.
He said, 'The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who
wasn't my wife!'
The audience was in silence and shock. He added, '... and that woman was my
mother!' Laughter and applause.
A week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried to
crack this very effective joke at home.
He said loudly, 'The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a
woman who was not my wife!'
His wife went red with shock and rage.
Standing there for 20 seconds trying to recall the second half of the
sentence,
the manager finally blurted out '... and I can't remember who she was!'
*Moral of the story: *
*Don't copy if you can't paste!*
1:18 PM
A white man was seated next to a little black girl on the airplane when he turned to her and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger."
The little girl, who had just opened her coloring book, closed it slowly and said to the man, "What would you like to talk about?"
"Oh, I don't know," said the man. "Since you are black, do you think that So-called President Elect Barak Obama is qualified for the job?" and he smiles.
"OK", she said. 'That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff -grass -. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?"
The man, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no idea."
To which the little girl replies, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss Politics ..... When you clearly don't understand shit!!!"
1:10 PM
Teacher: "Give me three reasons why the world is round!"
Pupil: "Well my dad says so, my mum says so and you say so!"
1:04 PM
A lonely frog, desparate for some form of company telephoned the Psychic Hotline to find out what his future holds. His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."
The frog is thrilled and says, "This is great! Where will I meet her, at work, at a party?"
"No" says the psychic, "in a Biology class."
1:03 PM
Son: "Dad, will you do my math for me tonight?"
Dad: "No, son, it wouldn't be right."
Son: "Well, you could try."
12:59 PM
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says: "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started".
Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger".
He held her hand and said, "Second, I'd advise you to relax. Let's have a cup of coffee, then" he sighed, "let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."
12:59 PM
After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for our anniversary. What do you think it means?"
"You'll know tonight," he said.
That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife.
Delighted, she opened it to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams."
12:57 PM
What do dolphins and men have in common?
They say that they're intelligent but no one's been able to prove that.
12:57 PM
Teacher: "If 1+ 1 = 2 and 2+ 2 = 4, what is 4+ 4?"
Little Johnny: "That's not fair you answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!"
1:09 PM
शाम ढल चुकी मगर...
शाम ढल चुकी मगर, रात अभी बाकी है,
दील तो टूट गया, मगर, जज्बात अभी बाकी है|
वो आयेंगे हमारे दर पे, ये यकीन है मुझको,
अरमाँ तो मर गए, मगर, आश अभी बाकी है||
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